Fanning the Flames

Fanning the Flames

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Gone but not Lost

Pau are the chanting voices among Hawaii’s Kings and Queens
The fishing nets thrown into abundant seas
And the poetic language of the people.
Gone are the winds of our ancestors
The rice fields in Waikiki
The sparse and open land upon the ocean
So long has the chord to our Mother been severed
We have been weaned from her tit without notice.
We have become deaf to the rocks and trees, lands and seas
Blind to the natural beauty that is around us, beneath us, above us,
And the inherent beauty that we are.
For now, KAPU is written around our spirits
We stand still, afraid to cross imaginary lines of illusion and lies.
Our warriors of Polynesian decent have become children once again
Sucking fragile tits of yeast and barley in colacoa (kalakoa) bottles.
Man made mixtures of unnatural chemicals are smoked
Poisoning our Aloha.
Even our brothers and sister of pure blood
Have become Haoles, they are without Aloha
Without the knowledge, without the Breath of Life.
Long gone, forever changed, but not lost
For a few have found the over grown paths of our ancestors
They have reattached to our Mother and have searched frantically
For old ways, old songs, old legends of old truths forgotten.
Today I listen and hear the ancient chants full of life
Calling us home like prodigal sons and daughters forgiving all.
In silence I find my own breath, in breath I find the old voices
And hear the rebirth of my own.
In this moment I return to the islands that are Hawaii
Placing my forehead and nose to Mother Hawaii
Breathing deep, full, and pure
Life returns

Richard Nedervelt
28 Sept 2010

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Kenji's Laws (My cat)

Ten things, my cat Kenji taught me.

Do yoga every morning, stretch before even getting out of bed.

Ask for what you want in life. Even if other may not understand you, be persistent and keep going until you’re understood and you get your answer.

If someone you love is to distracted by work, worries, studies, give them some time, but then move in, get their attention, and when their good and relaxed move on so then can get things done.

Kneading someone is much nicer then NEEDING someone, God is all we truly need to be complete. The rest of our true needs will be met in Divine time and not ours, so why stress.

Sex isn’t everything, (Well?) sometimes just cozening up to someone for closeness, a massage, a back-scratch, or in Kenji’s case a little Kneading is just perfect. He often offers the massage first knowing I will reciprocate.

If no one has time to spend with you or play, grab a toy mouse, throw it up in the air, and play with it yourself.

Listen to you six-sense or gut instinct. His sense is mostly always correct. He knows when a bath is coming or I’m going to cut his nails. Then he makes a game out of it to see if I can catch him. Often times, I give up until I can catch him off guard.

Say Hello to everyone. In my last building that I use to live in and the present one, he says, “Meow” to everyone and almost everyone meows or talks back to him. He doesn’t stop to think, “Will they like me? Will I come across strange? Will they get the wrong idea?” He just tries and if they don’t say anything and they give him a weird look, he just ignores it and relaxes a little more in his spot or continues on his stroll.

If you get bored move on to the next activity or project, don’t over think it, just react. Sometimes action is all it takes to make the good times roll.

If you got shit, bury it, don’t carry it.
Do your business and move on, don’t tote it around for others to deal with, cause believe me when I say there is more where that came from. Bury it and then run like hell.

Monday, September 6, 2010

Song

Flowing forth in an abundant cascade of peace and tranquility,
That which I inhale enters and is released
From the very core that is me, my spirit is reborn,
Sounding out a concerto created for the One that is within all.
With eyes close my head slowly turns tilting ever so slightly to the right,
Floating, free falling, sailing into the universe, continuing as if inside me each breath
Is a triumphant and joyous note that is being created
to be placed into the most sacred of compositions,
and I the composer, forgetting time and place, past and future,
Here and now, I live in this moment like music.
With breath
With love that is heard as if a thousand angels have gathered
Singing for me
Singing for love
Singing for peace
I close my eyes and tilt my head ever so slightly to the left and I smile
For God is present and I am present and nothing else matters in this moment.
For there is song now that answer every questions, calms every breath
Releases every worry, and embraces me as completely
as the wind embraces the Heavens
And a melody embraces a single moment in continuous repetition,
Like water flowing in a cycle that never ends.

Richard Nedervelt
07-13-08

Oh Spirit

Inside the outer
deeply intertwined
I meander and call out
"Oh Spirit! Oh Spirit of mine!"
Inside the outer
Nothing is over looked or passed by
In the darkest corners I bring light
I find the greatest voids and call out waiting for echos and answers to return
I lift up fallen dreams setting them upright where they stand
I set a fire to old memories burning them so that they rise into this internal universe
so that they become part of all that is and will be
so that they are not alone or remembered with labels of worth
so that they are more then any given moment dictates
Inside I call forth the lost spirit
I call that child, the wife, the son, the daughter, the dead
I call out, "Oh Spirit, You are needed, you are loved, and you have a purpose."
"Oh Spirit, I call you home, I call you in, I call you back, and I reclaim you."
Inside the deepest ocean, the fiercest storm, the widest cavern, I call you and take you back to my chest, I raise my voice releasing the pains real and imagined
I make room inside for brother spirit
I make room for me to be me
I make room for inside to shine outside
I make peace and reclaim my Spirit and my Life
Inside I thank Spirit for hearing my cry and heeding my plea
Inside I breath deep outside, until all spirits and mine are one

"Oh Spirit."

At One - Moment

I hope that I will remain in this moment.
Seeing with childlike vision, not knowing the time,
pleading to stay in the current of the ocean just a little while longer.
Here, resting face up on a sandy shore, I change like a chameleon
as waves and whitewash circle my feet and return to the open sea before me.
In this moment,so still, aware, at peace, needing nothing more
then what is before me.
I follow the flow of my breath in
like Alice into the rabbit hole
and I follow my breath out
returning to the present.
Like a traveler, I come and go with each breath roaming everywhere and yet remaining at one with this moment at all times, enjoying the feasts before me, knowing what is here, in this place, is all that matters.
In this moment, I know the creator
In this moment, I see with eyes wide open
In this moment, I follow my breath in and out
In this moment, I am and I understand.
Smiling, knowing that it is all that matters...

Richard Nedervelt
05-28-09

Sunday, September 5, 2010

With Eyes Closed


Inside the turtle's shell
Shell squared and hard
Hard and alive but hidden
Hidden from others and self
Self existing at every point
Point now pointing to the truth
Truth fills the shell
Shell hard squared protecting
Protecting soft rounded edges
Edges too long hidden inside
Inside, moving, racing, beating, fighting, feeling, loving,
Loving with eyes closed
Closed mind opens inside out
Out into the sea-open see
See with eyes closed.

Richard Nedervelt

Friday, September 3, 2010

Twilight to Twilight

This was written for a women who had just lost her son.

From your creation
From your desire
I flowed from known waters
Into your arms.
Like the old man and the sea
We knew one another.
You cradled me from twilight to twilight
Speaking to my soul, guiding me homeward
You were the calm and turbulent sea
Always pushing me up and forward
Through flowing blues and greens and
White curls breaking near the stern shore.

From known waters, we came forth
Onto this liquid blue orb
And though we ebb separately, we were never alone.
…But now without the confines of form
I have become breath
Lifting into the other blue
Evaporating into the light.
Now, I am a star burning bright
Guiding you from twilight to twilight.



02 Feb 2000
From Richard Nedervelt

I Heard My Father’s Voice.

In dreams, in free flowing streams of thought,
in my childhood and adolescence, I heard him clearly.
In my laughter among friends and strangers
while playing in street side gutters, watching paper boat sail away
I heard Him call.
My name rang past swaying branches and wings in flight
past morning suns and evenings too.
My name was called home and I would follow like a mouse would the pied
piper whistling diddles in my head to the tone of my Fathers voice.
I heard Him call through the waning and waxing of moons
I heard Him call when words were lost and I was beside myself in
thick forest among the echoes of their ancient voices.
I heard Him call when the winds died down and the trees had fallen.

And now, childhood has passed and I am no longer in my teens and yet
When I am still.
When I am in the present.
When I silence the unknown and forgotten.
I hear my Father’s voice.
In between the breaths that are my life
I hear my Father’s voice calling me
and within a portion of a second
I call back
Father......
Lord, I am here....

Richard Nedervelt

Are you there?


I thought you had left
I felt so free without you here
Not having to cater to your needs
I thought you had left
Until I woke to find you inside me
Like an unwelcome worm gnawing away inside an apple
You began to slowly devour me
While I hung around simple waiting to fall or be picked
only to be thrown away as soon as you presence is detected
I thought you had left me
But like imaginary slow motion hornets
You built a tightly packed nest under my cranium
While you feed upon gray matter and gray matters
Your presence bring yesterdays into the present
And forces me to look upon the future through your eyes
I thought you had left me
I thought you were no longer an option
I thought I was free
Was I wrong?

Richard Nedervelt
6/22/00

In Verse

In verse I appear
in this moment of creation I dissolve into the unknown
only to reappear with words which I give form.
Beginning with a creative impulse,
random words receive their first pulse as a whole.
Though new, they have taken my life time to prepare
for their presence of being,for their awakening,
for their existence on this plain in which I write.

Now a blinking cursor fills the empty space where pen once filled paper
or feather fell upon parchment,
bringing into existence what my mind’s eye reveals at random.

Ancient words become present taking form in me
and then in minds unknown
breathing new life into space with each new reading.

In verse, I find what was lost and share what was given
In verse, I wake from my illusions and find truth in unlikely places.
In verse, I offer up the gifts hidden within me from birth
In verse, I appear.

In the box

Jack in the box
Held in with locks
How will he ever escape?

Frozen in ice
Silent as mice
See how his lips are taped.

Jack in the box
Likes to eat rocks
But not one can he find.

Stuck on a spring
Crown like a king
Now doesn’t he look divine?

Jack in the box
Breaks all the locks
The latch will set him free

There in the corner
Little Jack Horner
Look, do you see what I see?

RichardNedervelt
80’s poem

Haiku's and Misc Thoughts

While waiting for tomorrow
The sun rose and set reflecting its light upon the moon.
And I
In search of my dreams
Slept through the day.


I am a part of water, earth, fire, air, and flesh
And therefore I am.
By trusting myself, my decisions, my actions
And each moment as it exist
I am fearless and I am happy.


Afraid of burning
One becomes charred, blackened, and left in darkness
Without every truly living.


Sonzai Sora/Blue skies
Hashi o koetaru/ crossing a river
Ii tenki nari/ It’s a lovely day.


A rock cleaves open
A spider enters within
No more boundaries.


Pearls
Stones become the grains
Feeding oysters in blue seas
Metamorphosis.


Lotus rise and bloom
In morning’s light, petals spread
Resting in darkness.


Whirlpools
Beginnings and ends
Many lives blend into one
Flowing freely round.


Love Song
Mayonaka ni-In the dark of night
Ai no sasayaki-Whispers of love can be heard
Korogi uta.-In a crickets song.


I am an acorn
Falling from empty leaves
Rising on my own.


We turn from darkness
Denying winter exists
Spring goes unnoticed.


Richard Nedervelt
Misc thoughts...

I am


I am vast. I am Mystery.
I am images that alter, like ripples in a stream.
I am the unknown in physical form.
I am mist. I am song. I am keys of ivory and ebony.
I am lyric and air.
I am sound and echoes.
I am silence in empty fields, the thunder and the lightning.
I am you in your sorrow and in the radiance of your bliss.
I am the first cry at birth and the last breath in exhalation.
I am desire. I am peace.
I am the memories of past and future,
Of lives lived and lives not yet awaken.
I am anger, envy, jealousy, and revenge,
But most of all I am forgiveness.
I am like nothing that has ever come before,
And everything that has ever existed.
I am the tears of my brothers and their wounds lain open in battle.
I am so much at once and yet nothing and everything.......
I am God manifest in flesh and Satin on his knees.
There is nothing that I am not and nothing that I can not be.
I am.....

Oct 2005
Richard Nedervelt

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Four Locks of Gray


Four locks of gray, do you see what they say,
Why do I worry my life away?
No more hiding, nor crying,
No deceiving, or lying,
For today, I'm just being me.

Smiling a smile - I'll laugh for awhile
It will never be taken away.
For I've lived and died, and paid with my pride
And now, I've got something to say!

I am who I am - I do what I do
I’m living for me now and not just for you.
Please open your heart, and hear what I say
For there's more to me than the colors I wave.

You may be angry, confused, or sad,
But I too have felt these for so long.
Now all I wish is that you'll understand
So our friendship may grow twice as strong.

Don’t turn your back or run away
For I'm still the person you knew.
It's just that now, in this time and place
I must try and start anew.

For years I was silent and played the game
But now it is over and done.
For I’ve finally beaten this battle of life
Yes, at long last I have won....


Aug 5th, 1984
By Richard J, Nedervelt




Hush


Let the brutal traffic cease
Let the moment be a song
Let the past slip away
But let it make you strong.

Let each dream crystallize
Let the impossible come true
Let compassion be a reason
In everything you do.

Let hatred be a past-tense
Let its poison be disgorged
Let love become an instrument
With love let life be forged.

Let enemies be victims
Let all doubters be your guide
Let all of their misgivings
Show your heart where not to hide.

Let forgiveness be your nectar
Let family be your wine
Let strangers be your teachers
And let kindness freely shine.

Let hush the haunting voices
Grow wings where once doubt reigned

Let the love in your possession
Be the joy that won’t be tamed.

Richard Nedervelt

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Kapu

The poem below is written in Hawaiian Pigeon English. (My Style)

KAPU (KEEP OUT)

Inside
Where you go stay hiding
Stay hidden.
You like da’kine
But you no like giv
Cuz you tink
Not going be enuf for you.
When you wuz yung
Something when go broke inside
And now you two ascared
To take da’kine chance.
KAPU stay writtin on your hart
Telling everyone
Keep Out!

____________________________________________________

Translation

Inside
Where you are hiding
It is hidden.
You want something
But you are afraid to give it
Because you think
There is not enough for you.
When you were young
Something broke inside
And now you are to afraid
To take a chance.
Keep Out is written on your heart
Telling everyone
Kapu!




Richard Nedervelt

I C A Good Man



He has always been good
He knew he was good
But he didn't believe
He was good.
Others knew he was good
Others told him he was good
But he wouldn't believe he was good
Even though he knew he was good.
I C A Good Man.
No matter what he believed in the past
He knows now what he has always known
Except now he BELIEVES...


Richard Nedervelt


Bits and Pieces...

Though dreamers are called jesters
By herds of grazing sheep.
Knowledge is the gift they give
To those who only sleep....



In search of the answer
I found a well of questions
that better quenched my thirst
than any single answer could have.



Without compassion
the symbol of the fish
becomes a noose.



Lady Fingers
Silent and gentle
Her unspoken love is heard
Soft, soothing, and strong.



The dark of night
Whispers of love are heard
In a crickets song.



Footprints

Though I have left footprints in the sand,
I know there is no evidence left behind.
For the sun has scorched where I have stepped
And the wind has blown over what the ocean has washed away
Now nothing remains except the memories of journeys
I can never repeat....


Richard Nedervelt
Misc Dates

Que Vadis?



If I be woman, man, cripple, too dark or light
If my eyes be crescent or full,
If my tongue twists in ways foreign to you,
Shall I be judged inferior?

If my flesh be peeled back and laid open
If my heart, my mind, my limbs be severed
Would you despise me still?
Would your hate then be tempered
Or would the very marrow within my bones
Demand your spurn.

If I remained standing
Would you force me to
Bend like reeds tapping earth
Beneath the onslaught of a tempest
Or would you insist
My naked bones
Be burnt and ground to ash.

Would this grant either of us peace
Or would my memory alone
Instill in you
Even more fear...


Richard Nedervelt